This is EXACTLY why I would never wish for conservitards to disappear altogether. If you can’t be arsed to watch (but you really should), the above link is a clip from The Colbert Report, in which Stephen Colbert discusses a Fox & Friends report on the perils of catching herpes from playing beer pong. The [...]
I mean, yeah, it was a good tantrum for an amateur. Take a page from the master, nancy boy roookie.
Aaand the #1 sign that this Twilight thing has jumped the shark*: Hot Topic is selling “Edward Cullen Body Glitter”. But will it hold up when the police have to turn the firehoses on you?
*If you get me drunk enough, I would probably admit this is something I would have begged my mother to purchase [...]
Look, it’s Friday, and I’m just counting the hours until I can go home and get drunk off limoncello, so spare me the tedious post-debate commentary. I just want to know one thing: What Ferris Bueller character is Sarah Palin? Hint: She’s No Sloan.
See more insightful and thought-provoking Star Wars, Software, Locomotive visual comparisons [...]
You probably thought Ralph Nader was the weirdest motherfucker running for POTUS this time around, what with that whole talking to parrots thing.
Well, you’d be wrong. Turns out there’s someone even crazier than ol’ Ralphie “Fuck you, Gore” Nader, and it’s this crazy asshole: Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey, who is running on an eponymous ticket. [...]
“Oh, thank god. Now we just have to ask Kiefer
Sutherland how to stop the next terrorist attack.”
This would make for an interesting, if short, episode of CSI:
A 60-year-old man, having lived with his rubbery companion for a few years after his wife passed away, decided to move in with his kids and felt like it was time to move on. He was too attached to chop his former lover up into pieces [...]
Have a great Labor Day weekend, folks! Remember: as your ivory colored feet slip into those snug fitting topsiders, this weekend was brought to you by the unwashed working classes!!
We’ll be claiming our own historic destiny by taking the next week off (summer break you know, sleeping til 2pm, brushing our teeth at 4pm, doing [...]