Not content with having ruined Journey, lumberjack shirts, and Williamsburg; 2008 was the year that hipsters bent their black frame eyeglassed-gaze on bacon, the heretofore innocent treat of our Sunday breakfasts.
Hipster doofuses have added bacon to everything from chocolate to vodka this year. Part of my rage stems from the fact that I suspect it’s probably all delicious (I like bacon, and chocolate, and vodka; why wouldn’t I enjoy all of them together?), but now carries the rancid taint of hipsterdom.
Why do they do it? Part of it is some kind of dick-measuring oneupmanship about how DECADENT and UNHEALTHY they are, like teenagers bragging about how many kegstands they can do, or smoking unfiltered cigarettes. LIVE FAST, DIE YOUNG, LEAVE A DIABEETUS-RIDDLED CORPSE!
And another part of it is just the fine hipster tradition of mocking poor and/or rural people, something they, swaddled against reality with trust funds and hedge fund management jobs, know jack shit about.
Wake me up when the inevitable “tuna-noodle casserole” trend rolls around, because I make a damn fine one.
No!!! They can’t have it!
bacon is OURS!
go away hipsters!
Wake up:
http://casserolecrazy.com/
Bacon is the new penguin:
http://www.yaybia.com/2008/08/bacon-is-new-penguin.html
Is knitting over?
Why the eff do you care what hipsters think? Isn’t that a hipster thing to do? By letting hipsters ruin bacon for you, you’re being just like a hipster worrying about mass-market success ruin their favorite band.
Get over it. If hipsters liking bacon ruins it for you, then maybe you don’t DESERVE bacon!
Yes, Garth. Because this article is 100% factual and sarcasm-free. This is totally how I actually feel about both bacon and hiptards.
Natasha, do you think we need big WHOOPWHOOPWHOOP sirens and flashing lights to alert casual readers that we might be indulging in sarcasm and hyperbole here? Just a thought.
Lots of hipster hyperbole in this article.
LOL@article.
Boy is this ever true! I have friends (who adamantly swear to be NON-hipsters) making all gross types of bacon food! Your comment on the hipster fad of over indulgence is dead on. Why have I seen these total non-hipsters eating bacon wrapped krispe creme and bacon rice crispy treats?! Although I will admit the candied bacon was delish…still, non-hipster status REVOKED forever!
Yes, and Garth’s comment is totally sarcasm-free as well.
Ah yes, the “Well, I was only being sarcastic TOO!” gambit that hasn’t fooled anyone since 3rd grade.
Nice save, Garth. I mean, “Jack Shit”.
the hipsters have already taken over Casseroles, I watched them at a casserole competition in Greenpoint, video here: http://tinyurl.com/5qwzsa
AND
I make a great Tuna Casserole, here’s my video version on Gardenfork: http://tinyurl.com/5f45o2
Funny post. We must be ever vigilant against the menace of hipster doofus-dom. Funny how they all end up wearing a hipster uniform in their bid to be unique. I would like to drive a mack truck filled with trucker hats up their collective asses.
trucker hats are worn by douchebags, not hipsters. there is a distinction.
[...] the legion of doom, bacon has been taken over by the least wholesome and good group - the hipsters. This article on Public School Intelligensia had me laughing soy milk out of my nose this morning at work - give [...]
By turning your back on the hipsters, aren’t you engaging in your own brand of one-upmanship? I say bring the hipsters into the bacon fold… once it’s not ironic and pseudo-anti-establishment, they will go away on their own.
-mike
————–
http://mudsweatbeers.blogspot.com/2008/12/viva-la-bacon.html
————–
they’re just trendy kids, yo - just like kids from the 90’s, 80s, 70’s, and I imagine, the 1870’s. (I wonder if they were wearing Confederate uniforms ironically back then.) Cut’em a little slack, I say.
Yo
Yo
Fuck bacon
And other treyf
Your obsession with “hiptards” makes you seem like a bit of a hipster yourself.
Furthermore, this isn’t funny.
http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u268/CHIX4ME2/hipster.jpg
[...] 2008 was the year that hipsters went crazy for bacon, putting it in everything from chocolate to booze and practically wiping their asses with it. Not content with having ruined fixed gear bikes, Nike high-tops, and the entire Obama candidacy; 2008 was the year that hipsters bent their black frame eyeglassed-gaze on bacon, the heretofore innocent treat of our Sunday breakfasts. [...]
[...] It’s like the thing that ruined bacon; insubstantial enthusiasm in place of personality or even a point to make. The Fuckyeahs are essentially a cheap way to graft something to your personal brand and create a perception of edge/energy that’s kind of scam. Suddenly, you are cool and edgy like a wizard by association without having to actually know or risk anything. You don’t leave fuckyeah sharks understanding but you leave feeling simultaneously clever but lightly beatified cause “yeah, I stuck it to irony. I really think sharks are awesome.” when, if anything, it’s just made you incrementally dumber. [...]
[...] apparently, I’ve been greased. Everyone is talking about how bacon was a one of the hottest hipster food trends of 2008. I think its totally hilarious but I’m not entirely sure I get it. Is [...]
[...] If Felten is right, then the “bandwidth hog” is an imaginary creature for the digital age, a sort of postindustrial unicorn. Unlike the unicorn, however, bandwidth hog makes terrific eating; its bacon is the single tastiest kind of bacon imaginable, shot through with the flavors of 4chan, the essence of Twitter, and a small pinch of TechCrunch (warning: it’s pretty pungent). If Felten does slay the mythical beast, Internet hipsters everywhere can rejoice… then slap crispy strips of bandwidth hog bacon into their vodka and ice cream. [...]
[...] If Felten is right, then the “bandwidth hog” is an imaginary creature for the digital age, a sort of postindustrial unicorn. Unlike the unicorn, however, bandwidth hog makes terrific eating; its bacon is the single tastiest kind of bacon imaginable, shot through with the flavors of 4chan, the essence of Twitter, and a small pinch of TechCrunch (warning: it’s pretty pungent). If Felten does slay the mythical beast, Internet hipsters everywhere can rejoice… then slap crispy strips of bandwidth hog bacon into their vodka and ice cream. [...]
[...] If Felten is right, then the "bandwidth hog" is an imaginary creature for the digital age, a sort of postindustrial unicorn. Unlike the unicorn, however, bandwidth hog makes terrific eating; its bacon is the single tastiest kind of bacon imaginable, shot through with the flavors of 4chan, the essence of Twitter, and a small pinch of TechCrunch (warning: it’s pretty pungent). If Felten does slay the mythical beast, Internet hipsters everywhere can rejoice… then slap crispy strips of bandwidth hog bacon into their vodka and ice cream. [...]
[...] If Felten is right, then the “bandwidth hog” is an imaginary creature for the digital age, a sort of postindustrial unicorn. Unlike the unicorn, however, bandwidth hog makes terrific eating; its bacon is the single tastiest kind of bacon imaginable, shot through with the flavors of 4chan, the essence of Twitter, and a small pinch of TechCrunch (warning: it’s pretty pungent). If Felten does slay the mythical beast, Internet hipsters everywhere can rejoice… then slap crispy strips of bandwidth hog bacon into their vodka and ice cream. [...]
Hipsters are about the furthest thing from hedge fund managers. Hedge fund managers are typically guys in their 40s-60s and make millions a year…
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