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Woes of The Patrician Class: Your kids get kicked out of private school? EVERYBODY WINS!

03.02.09 by Natasha | 9 Comments | Digg This

A lot of people traffic this site because for our unique brand of parenting tips (Tip #482 one should never yell directly at a child. Simply waving the gun around their face should do the trick). We feel passionate about child-rearing and we’re especially concerned with the rearing techniques of the vapidly wealthy. So imagine our delight when NYT ran a piece about how Little Sally Warbucks might not be able to attend private school this year because mom and pop are in a pinch with the whole recession thing. Goodie! We believe, as mentors to the younger, sluttier, 3.0 generation that its in every one’s best interest that the saplings of our future go to public school.

Indeed, it’s the trust fund brigade that I blame for so many woes of this country. Now, I gave up on the whole class warfare idea when I hung up my dickies and Operation Ivy shirt (and opened an a Luxe card account at BR!) back in the’90s, but I still get a righteous amount of resentment towards the bubble children of private school. Unlike most other countries, the US is largely free from an obvious caste system so when vestiges of the moneyed class show — first class airline seating, elite private grade schools, and giant gated communities — I’m just incensed like some common prole spat upon by a grubby factory owner.

So, why should soft-as-a-lilly kids go to public school?

Because we did! That’s what we (Ande, Sarah, Matty, Sascha, ME) all have in common. We all went through the rough and tumble expierence of public school and are goddamn better for it. There’s no doubt that public school is baptism by fire. Its populous and brutish but its REAAAALL. Co-mingling with the ethnics, dealing with a bloated institution, competition for resources etc, is what we public school kids were thrown into. Pragmatics aside I think the best argument for sending your kids to public school, and being an active parent in one comes back to my main nigga T. Jefferson: a public school is a “public good” supported by “public revenue” because an educated citizenry is a cornerstone of a functional democracy. That’s what public schools are meant to do: they should not be repositories for the poor.

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« What Do We Want? “LOWER STANDARDS!” When Do We Want It? “NOW!”: Whiny Liberal Arts Majors Complain About Not Getting Enough Partial Credit
» Guess whose back in the Ayatollah’s house, with a fat dick in yo motherfuckin’ mouth?