What is it about Beth Ditto that makes journalists lose their objectivity faster than virginity on Prom Night? I’m not sure what annoys me more:
The haters, like British GQ’s Alex Bilmes. He sneered and air-quoted his way through an article that called Ditto a “fat lesbian” (”lesbian” obviously being nearly as big a crime as “fat”) and a “porker” who was “pathologically exhibitionist”; said her band Gossip was “deeply average”; and berated the fashion industry as “stupid” for lionizing her and said they they’re only using her as an outsized human shield so other fat people couldn’t accuse them of sizism. Jeez Alex, who pissed on your scones?;
The gushers, like The Sunday Times’ Giles Hattersley, who waxes rapsodic about Ditto’s body, comparing her arms to “slabs of freshly baked ciabatta” and wanting to render the “play of light across her love handles” in oils. Also, her best friend is a unicorn and she farts glitter!
Beth Ditto’s profile is particularly large (HA HA SEE WHAT I DID THERE) in Britian right now, because she’s just designed a line for Evans, the plus-sized wing of the Topshop chain. Frankly, I think it all resembles the clothes I grew out of right around the time Miami Vice was hitting its peak. But I am an old; it might not be a drawback to people too young to remember the first time black stretch pants paired with oversized sequined purple tops were hawt.